After weeks of late-night sleeps and dinner-less evenings, it's finally over. I can't believe it! I've finally finished with my thesis last night.... and it feels sooooo good. I actually don't care about bagging the best thesis this time around, as I did last term (tho I'm hoping I do).
I remember that pre-oral defense we had last 21 November 2005. I actually wasn't nervous at all, only eager to get out of that room and go home. I thought I was lucky that I was picked to go last but noooo.... MAN WAS I WRONG!... I have watched the panelists question my other classmates and it was not pretty.... talagang sinabon nila ung lahat! And i thought I was going to die next, I was one of those few unfortunate enough to be after the "Death Row" of our section... Ü so I really thought I was gonna be placed down REALLY bad... I already began thinking of the negative things they could say to me (especially regarding my respondents) and thought of possible ways to get myself out of trouble... I couldn't think of any one way to get out for all the possible critics that came to mind... I actually began to feel nervous once I began speaking in front, especially with classmates asking me to finish immediately since we all wanted to go home (we were 1 hr and 30 mins OT na)... to cut the story short, none of what I had expected happened... it was quite the opposite...
The panelists loved my topic so much and said not one negative thing... One actually told me, "You may have been the last but you're definitely not the least... I really love your topic,..." And another day, as I was heading to lunch, I bumped into that same panelist and she stopped me (as we were on the stairs), and said something like "Hey, I love your topic... your's my favorite... I can't wait till your final defense..." Greatest joys in my life...
I'm so proud! I did this thesis all on my own... WOW!!!! Somehow I feel relieved that my thesis is finally done but somehow, I do feel pressured to still do my best on the final defense... I really want to get that "best thesis" thing-y again... like brother, like sister... bwahahahaha!
Wednesday, February 22, 2006
Friday, February 17, 2006
Thinking Out Loud *continuation*
CSAT
I remember taking the CSAT (College Scholastic Aptitude Test) on 11 August 2005. I felt mentally drained after that. My head hurt terribly the whole day, I tried to sleep it off as I got home, but I couldn’t even get myself to lie down. Later that evening, my mom suggested I take my BP… though I knew it was pointless (we didn’t even know what my normal BP should be)… she said, "at least we’ll know more or less" … BP result was 94/53. And I told you, she had no idea whether that was high or low (see? Pointless!) but somehow, I think that’s low, just not sure…
Days (or weeks) later, the results came in. I was so sorry that I didn’t take the test that seriously (namely in the Science and Inductive Reasoning sections). I didn’t feel like doing long computations any longer or straining my brain too much on these sections cos that was when I started to feel weak; I suddenly wasn’t feeling well. Wonder how much higher my score would have been if I had been more "perked" up to take the test... :(
Sayang! Just a few more points and my Standard Score would have been Excellent. I only needed a score of at least 669 to be considered such when I got a 641, meaning Superior (so, not that bad)… English, 736 (Excellent)… Mathematics, 715 (Excellent)… Science, 556 (High Average), sayang talaga… Inductive Reasoning, 500 (Average)… well, okay, I found the IR part to be the hardest… guess it’s cos I’m a left-brainer, not a right-brainer.. Overall, got a percentile rank of 92… not bad… somehow, it’s good since I scored high (my parents actually wanted to frame the results… tsss…), but somehow, it’s not enough, when I think that I could have done MUCH better on that Science part… the worse part… these things only come once… OUCH.
MAJOR HIT ON THE HEAD
Every New Year, our family stays at Bellevue and that’s where we have our family get-together and gift giving, since we are all busy during the Christmas season with all the reunions going on. Last New Year’s eve, my brother and I headed to the mall together since we both got bored staying in the hotel rooms and he needed to get some groceries. As we were strolling around the mall, my brother asked me what I got for his daughter (my inaanak) for Christmas. He wanted to make sure she would get something she would enjoy, like toys (and not books, she gets those all the time na raw), since kawawa naman ung bata. She had an accident earlier that day as she tripped while running around with her cousin (baby boy of my other brother). Anyways, we ended up reminiscing the times when I was a kid. He began making fun of me by stating that as a kid, it was hard to give me gifts. I was never a girly-girl, he said. I didn’t believe him. He went on saying that I never liked Barbie dolls, I never really played with them. I never really played bahay-bahayan, luto-lutuan, and all those girly games. I still refused to believe, cos I did remember doing those as a toddler. He clarified that I did play those stuff but not really that often, it was actually very rare to see me hold a doll. He said, "You know what you always were consistent at? What you always liked to play with? Your favorite game?" I looked at him, trying to see if he was trying to play with me or if he was really serious… and he was serious and so I asked him what it was… "doctor-doctor," he said. "You would always ask mommy and daddy to buy those doctor play sets. You even had this very nice play set dad bought in the States, the stethoscope even produces beating sounds.." he continued and at that moment I remembered.
They say if you want to know what you would enjoy doing in the future, what you would be successful at, look back on what you liked to do as a child… imagine yourself doing that for your whole lifetime.
I remember taking the CSAT (College Scholastic Aptitude Test) on 11 August 2005. I felt mentally drained after that. My head hurt terribly the whole day, I tried to sleep it off as I got home, but I couldn’t even get myself to lie down. Later that evening, my mom suggested I take my BP… though I knew it was pointless (we didn’t even know what my normal BP should be)… she said, "at least we’ll know more or less" … BP result was 94/53. And I told you, she had no idea whether that was high or low (see? Pointless!) but somehow, I think that’s low, just not sure…
Days (or weeks) later, the results came in. I was so sorry that I didn’t take the test that seriously (namely in the Science and Inductive Reasoning sections). I didn’t feel like doing long computations any longer or straining my brain too much on these sections cos that was when I started to feel weak; I suddenly wasn’t feeling well. Wonder how much higher my score would have been if I had been more "perked" up to take the test... :(
Sayang! Just a few more points and my Standard Score would have been Excellent. I only needed a score of at least 669 to be considered such when I got a 641, meaning Superior (so, not that bad)… English, 736 (Excellent)… Mathematics, 715 (Excellent)… Science, 556 (High Average), sayang talaga… Inductive Reasoning, 500 (Average)… well, okay, I found the IR part to be the hardest… guess it’s cos I’m a left-brainer, not a right-brainer.. Overall, got a percentile rank of 92… not bad… somehow, it’s good since I scored high (my parents actually wanted to frame the results… tsss…), but somehow, it’s not enough, when I think that I could have done MUCH better on that Science part… the worse part… these things only come once… OUCH.
MAJOR HIT ON THE HEAD
Every New Year, our family stays at Bellevue and that’s where we have our family get-together and gift giving, since we are all busy during the Christmas season with all the reunions going on. Last New Year’s eve, my brother and I headed to the mall together since we both got bored staying in the hotel rooms and he needed to get some groceries. As we were strolling around the mall, my brother asked me what I got for his daughter (my inaanak) for Christmas. He wanted to make sure she would get something she would enjoy, like toys (and not books, she gets those all the time na raw), since kawawa naman ung bata. She had an accident earlier that day as she tripped while running around with her cousin (baby boy of my other brother). Anyways, we ended up reminiscing the times when I was a kid. He began making fun of me by stating that as a kid, it was hard to give me gifts. I was never a girly-girl, he said. I didn’t believe him. He went on saying that I never liked Barbie dolls, I never really played with them. I never really played bahay-bahayan, luto-lutuan, and all those girly games. I still refused to believe, cos I did remember doing those as a toddler. He clarified that I did play those stuff but not really that often, it was actually very rare to see me hold a doll. He said, "You know what you always were consistent at? What you always liked to play with? Your favorite game?" I looked at him, trying to see if he was trying to play with me or if he was really serious… and he was serious and so I asked him what it was… "doctor-doctor," he said. "You would always ask mommy and daddy to buy those doctor play sets. You even had this very nice play set dad bought in the States, the stethoscope even produces beating sounds.." he continued and at that moment I remembered.
They say if you want to know what you would enjoy doing in the future, what you would be successful at, look back on what you liked to do as a child… imagine yourself doing that for your whole lifetime.
Thinking Out Loud
Over the past week, many thoughts have been going on in my head… there’s the echo of our current lesson in Physics regarding the thermal efficiency of heat engines,... then, there's the nightmare on the world of sines, cosines, tangents, secants, cosecants, cotangents, ek ek… and, there’s that danger light flashing in my brain that serves as my warning and it reads: "MAGBASA-BASA KA NA SA PANITIKAN KUNG NAIS MO PA PUMASA!!!" hehe… cos fast fact lang: I have NEVER read a single chapter of any school book since I was a kid (except those for book reports and my science books), nor do I ever listen to the teachers (except in science again, and music- and probably also in stats, public speaking and methods of research)… I’m the type of person who basically just jots down notes and that’s it… so ewan ko lang pano ako pumapasa…hehe… I’ve never encountered doing any serious studying in my whole entire life! Ü
Anyway, all those thoughts in my head kept me "busy" lately… but during spare times, I couldn’t help but ponder on what was to become of my college life and life after that… it was only this week that I once again began panicking… wondering if I had made a right choice…
Listed below are the choices I had for college:
Listed below are the choices I had for college:
- Medicine
- Music
- Culinary Arts
- HRM
- Mass Communications
Right now, the plan I have is to take Mass Communications then go on pursuing my real desire, Med. Not too bad, considering Mass Comm. is still on my top 5 choices. But somehow, I’m hoping I could wait that long… this route would take a minimum of 14 years!!! Golly wow! Imagine that time plus, the time I need to take up a specialization… oh well, it would all be worth it…
Music, let’s just say I was inspired to take this up when my "former" confidante (and then best friend) suggested I take this up instead of med during my junior years… he’s my music teacher and also our choir moderator… he kept giving my ego a lift saying things like "kaya mo iyan" or "galing-galing mo sa pagkanta/ sa choir/ sa music eh" or "sobrang gifted ka naman sa music eh,.. mag music ka na!" Yeah, it did intrigue me to, as he said, "explore the awesome world of music"… after all, music was another one of my passions…
Culinary Arts, one-year course that would allow you to earn as much as half a million dollars per month! But my parents still thought of it as a no-no, saying that I wouldn’t get to have a good future if I took that up and that I’d just end up being a waitress…READ: C-U-L-I-N-A-R-Y! CULINARY=CHEFS, not WAITERS… no use pointing out HRM, since they said almost the same things…
But now, as I think of it, somehow, it’s a blessing in disguise that I didn’t get to take up culinary arts…. I think now that would just have been a major insult to my abilities… the CSAT says it all, baby. Ü
Now, all that’s left is medicine, my top choice! … And I really am feeling so guilty I haven’t taken a shot at UPM, when earlier this school year I’ve been planning to take an entrance for their College of Medicine… grrr!
Medicine’s been my interest since I was probably a kid! I remember the last time I even went to the States, the first thing I actually bought with my own money was this book on nutritional healing, I used all my money then (which my uncle gave me) just to buy that book and I must say, it’s very useful till now. Aside from my interest, there was one more important reason I bought that book. When we stayed in Hawaii for some days (this was our first destination), I had suddenly gotten sick with tonsillitis… a SEVERELY painful tonsillitis. Despite all the medications I’ve been trying, my condition just seemed to grow worse until I saw that book and decided to check it out.. I looked under tonsillitis and then I saw under the list of recommendations listed… yogurt. Yes, yogurt... who would have thought?! I quickly informed my mom and we decided to opt for that instead of those other drugs I had been taking. Days later, I noticed the pain was gone! We wanted to go back and buy the book but alas, there was no time. We had to leave soon for our flight to San Francisco… imagine my delight when I saw that book in one of the stores in San Francisco, I quickly went nearer and found that I was in luck… it was their last copy (good thing my uncle gave me money on that day!)… *continued next post*
Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Life's Harsh Realities
Lately, I have found that life can get pretty darn cruel.
News stations here and there have been reporting about the stampede that had happened at the Ultra. This event seems to be pretty ridiculous in my opinion. Sorry for being so rude but, come on! How could these people expect to be the lucky winner out of the thousands and thousands of people who have flocked to that venue for one main reason: WOWOWEE. My utmost condolences though, to those affected by the stampede.
Another thing is that crime rates all over our country have been steadily rising... take alone BF Homes, Pque., for example. Just last Sunday, at 0630 in the evening, somewhere in the Phase1 area, a nursing student of SISC had been stabbed and shot dead. The reason people say is due to car napping, but others actually suspect a grudge.
Third reality I have encountered over the past few weeks is about a former batch mate of mine who has recently given birth to her very own baby. The fact of her giving birth at such an early age was not really the catchy part of the news. Teenage pregnancy has become a common issue in this generation, in these days; and besides, I knew this girl, she was a (forgive my English) bitch, an obvious flirt and slut. The fact that this sort of stuff actually happen to people I know, people I grew up with, THAT'S the unbelievable part. The worse part is that the father's a good-for-nothing jerk (again, forgive me for the term). He's a former schoolmate of mine. He's older than I but due to his severe stupidity and foolishness, he still remains a high school freshman up to this day. How I pity what is to become of their lives. My sincere apologies for all the negative terms I've used but there simply isn't any better way to coin this type of scenario.
These events have happened only within the past 3 weeks or so; but there isn’t any way I was shocked by them. What could one expect from such a hopeless country like the Philippines? Don’t get me wrong; I do love our country, I am proud of my being a Filipino, but come on! Don’t let nationalism blind you of our country’s current situations. People today have become so self-absorbed that they only think of their benefits, and don’t really care about what happens to the rest of society. They have become self-indulgent people, wishing only to satisfy their wants and desires, and not giving consideration to its effects, not caring if what they do would actually cause the harm of millions of other people around them. Self-aggrandizement, I think that’s what each person these days truly care about... the aggressive increase in one’s own wealth, power, etc. So, now I ask this one question, what is now to become of our beloved country, the Philippines, if its own citizens remain an impostor to the characteristic of being a true Filipino - pagiging maka-Diyos, makabayan, makatao at makarangal?
News stations here and there have been reporting about the stampede that had happened at the Ultra. This event seems to be pretty ridiculous in my opinion. Sorry for being so rude but, come on! How could these people expect to be the lucky winner out of the thousands and thousands of people who have flocked to that venue for one main reason: WOWOWEE. My utmost condolences though, to those affected by the stampede.
Another thing is that crime rates all over our country have been steadily rising... take alone BF Homes, Pque., for example. Just last Sunday, at 0630 in the evening, somewhere in the Phase1 area, a nursing student of SISC had been stabbed and shot dead. The reason people say is due to car napping, but others actually suspect a grudge.
Third reality I have encountered over the past few weeks is about a former batch mate of mine who has recently given birth to her very own baby. The fact of her giving birth at such an early age was not really the catchy part of the news. Teenage pregnancy has become a common issue in this generation, in these days; and besides, I knew this girl, she was a (forgive my English) bitch, an obvious flirt and slut. The fact that this sort of stuff actually happen to people I know, people I grew up with, THAT'S the unbelievable part. The worse part is that the father's a good-for-nothing jerk (again, forgive me for the term). He's a former schoolmate of mine. He's older than I but due to his severe stupidity and foolishness, he still remains a high school freshman up to this day. How I pity what is to become of their lives. My sincere apologies for all the negative terms I've used but there simply isn't any better way to coin this type of scenario.
These events have happened only within the past 3 weeks or so; but there isn’t any way I was shocked by them. What could one expect from such a hopeless country like the Philippines? Don’t get me wrong; I do love our country, I am proud of my being a Filipino, but come on! Don’t let nationalism blind you of our country’s current situations. People today have become so self-absorbed that they only think of their benefits, and don’t really care about what happens to the rest of society. They have become self-indulgent people, wishing only to satisfy their wants and desires, and not giving consideration to its effects, not caring if what they do would actually cause the harm of millions of other people around them. Self-aggrandizement, I think that’s what each person these days truly care about... the aggressive increase in one’s own wealth, power, etc. So, now I ask this one question, what is now to become of our beloved country, the Philippines, if its own citizens remain an impostor to the characteristic of being a true Filipino - pagiging maka-Diyos, makabayan, makatao at makarangal?
Sunday, February 12, 2006
The Pressure of Valentines
Here comes one of the most dread seasons of singles out there, if it actually isn't at the top of the list... Yep, Happy Valentines... put some sarcasm into that and you probably get how I'm feeling about it.
Of the past 17 years of my existence, of all the Valentines I've had to go through, never - and I mean NEVER - was there ever a time when I felt its presence. Valentines, to me, was just an ordinary day; but to shopping malls and other business establishments (more so, with flower boutiques and chocolate factories), this was (or should I say IS) their lucky day. Entrepreneurs take advantage of this "special" day, as they certainly see it as a chance to see their business in BOOM.
It was not until last night that I felt the pressure of being solo. A friend of mine asked me to tell something about my so-called "love life", as we were going home from our usual Saturday night practice. She seemed so surprised to find out that I had nothing to say about it, since there was none. I'm a loyal member of the NBSB (No Boyfriend Since Birth) Society, and I don't get why people don't believe me when I say this for the umpteenth time! Going back, the drive home suddenly seemed like a job interview for possible "applicants", I was asked what qualifications my guy should have and so I mentioned the things I look for - maturity (as in those around 10 years OLDER than I), religiousness, humor (someone who loves a good laugh), musically-inclined, and most of all, mabait (ung tipong hindi mainitin ang ulo)... and VOILA! Now, it seemed that some matchmaking was being done! nice...this was the exact time I felt the pressure to find someone... but still, I refuse to, and decide to stick to my belief that the right person would come in time, in God's time. I fully entrust my life to Him. I know He wants me to have the best - and that I'll have in His own time.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
